the bf

K, so I just realized, I may have done something really stupid this past weekend! I cheated, not on my bf, but on my heart! Josh came to visit from Georgia, we had the best time ever! We went to the Oasis Spa in Ann Arbor, and had such a really romantic/kinky time! But I feel like I gave him a piece of me that I shouldn't have. He keeps telling me how he wants to move back up here, he wants to be with me, but I am really looking forward to being away from him for a while! I feel like I never got a chance to be young, we have been together since we were freshman in high school! I do miss all of my girls, though! I miss talking to them, and I keep telling them to come on here, chat with me online, but they won't! They tell me how only freaks and pervs are online... so what the hell does that say about me?!?

Anyway, back to the good stuff... Josh totally knows all the in's and out's of my bod, he knows exactly what to push and when to push it! I love it! It is so awesome to know that someone can just look at you the right way, and know in their head that it does something to ya! In the tub, on the floor, uh huh! I loved every minute of it! He has a cock ring, so its awesome when I'm on top, but its even better bent over! Can you say, "harder!" I can, and I did, for three hours of mind blowing extasy! It was what I needed, after stressing about school starting, my room mate situation, and my money situation, it was definately what I needed! Then, this is where I feel a little guilty, some hoe asked me Sunday night if I would consider letting her do stuff to me, and I think that is sick, so I said no, and now she is being a bitch to me! Anyway, I totally watched my room mate take a shower for about ten minutes, and it turned me on, so then I called Josh back and had phone sex for over an hour! It was so steamy! Gosh, too bad he couldn't have stayed longer! Now I won't get to see him again for months! But I will being seeing Shawn, and Nate, and Tim... all so cute, and so manly! I love living near all of these frat houses! They were all sitting out on the porch the other day, and to my surprise, I was jogging, and they all were whistling and asking for my digits! I have had some nice dreams about a gang bang with all those men! I woke up in the middle of the night last week, thought I was hot, but that wasn't it at all... I was actually dreaming of all of them! One in the front, one in the back, the other two watching, then tag teaming, then all of a sudden, GONE, it was all gone! I tried to go back to sleep to finish it, but I couldn't!

Josh told me that he loved me, and I didn't know what to say! I don't say that, he knows that! That word scares me, it makes me think of marriage and kids, all of the things that I don't want outta life! Can't I just be young, have fun, drink pepsi, LOL! My parents want Josh to propose so bad, and I know that... so I took the liberty of telling him before he left Sunday that if he even thinks of busting out a phat ring, with a gay ass proposal, I'm so done! More done then he'll ever know!